My first novel. But half the length of ed's or rob's.

Just got back from the BBG... I mean Falls Creek. Edward, Bryan, Whitney and I rode together to catch a worship service and some nightime activities. For those who don't know what Falls Creek is, it is a baptist youth encampment near Davis, OK. It is the largest Baptist youth camp in the world. Approx. 40,000+ youth and adults arrive every summer for camp. It's quite a scene. I have been either a camper or a worker at the camp for 13 years now. This summer is the first summer I haven't either been a camper nor employed there. I miss the place quite a bit. By the way, BBG is common non-Baptist terminology that stands for Baptist Breeding Grounds. I guess people have heard stories about all of the supposed "sex" that happens behind the cabins. I can't speak for people who have heard those stories but I've had some pretty good times behind some of those afformentioned cabins. . . . Ah...... anyway. I had a great time seeing some old friends that I've worked with over the past years or so. Seen some of the sites. Every year something is different. This year the tabernacle, which has stood in the same place since around 1918, is no longer. There is now an ampitheatre, where they now have the worship service (or, church). I was pretty impressed with it. Looked pretty good. The area where it was built looks so different than it did last year. It blew me away.

For those that care, the website for Falls Creek is http://www.fallscreekok.org/home.asp . There is a webcam showing the center of the falls creek grounds. What is seen is the volleyball courts and some parking spaces. Fun stuff.

Enough about The Creek.
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I haven't done this before on my blog. And there is a good reason for it. I've not really said much at all about my personal life on here. And as much as I'd like to say that everything is great and peachy. But it's hardly ever that. I struggle every day. Just like all of us. A lot of times I try to avoid my problems because I either don't want to deal with it or deal with the fact that I HAVE to deal with it.
I'm a non-confrontational guy. If something happens to me, I run. Spiritual problem? Again, I run. Emotional problem.... relationship problem..... etc. It's always the same: I run. Why do I run? Is it because I'm aware of my own shortcomings and I dont' trust myself to fix it? Or is it simply that I don't rely on God to control my life? I know the latter is true. And I definitely don't trust myself to fix anything, no matter the problem. I can't stand the fact knowing that I don't do everything to let God do everything. Does that make sense? I'll move on.

Relationships. I have no knowledge.

I think I'm at the age now where I want to settle down, get married, get a big house, and a nice job. I guess that means I'm growing up. I don't know. I'm freakin' out knowing that I'm 24 and not having much to show for it except for the fact that I've graduated college. But what now? But what about this whole gettin' married thing? Forget that, what about finding a girl who knows I'm alive first! That might be a good starting point. The other day I was talking to someone and this person asked me what am I looking for in a female. I said that I have simple needs. 1st and foremost, I'm looking for a christian. No exceptions. Everything else is a plus. It would be nice if she was attractive. But, if it's the girl God has for me then I'm not worried about if she'll be attractive to me. And, of course, she have to be attracted to me. That kinda limits the number of potential canidates already. In other words, "Not a lot of people think Kent is a sexy beast.'' (Imagine Chris Rock's voice saying that, I know ed gets that).

I guess what I'm trying to say is that I'm ready to start my life. I'm ready to find somebody. I'm ready to start a career.

Am I ready, Lord? I don't know Your plans for me. And not knowing is the toughest thing. That's what faith is, I suppose. Prepare me. Prepare me for her, whoever she is. Prepare me for the future, whatever that entails. Prepare me for that day when you call me home, whenever that is. Prepare me, Lord. Prepare me.

1 Peter 1:13