For 2 weekends in a row, I attended what I call "pre-wedding festivities". Some call it a "bachelor party", but I don't like using such words. And many .... uh.... interesting experiences occurred. My friend, Bryan, is getting married next weekend. So, Bryan and 4 of his friends (including me) went out and had some bachelor fun. We made him wear a "Groom" shirt, too, to make it official. And I'm cautious as to tell you these tales..... but I will.
Here was the game plan. Go to Bricktown and eat (Zio's). Which was familiar to me, because I did the same exact thing last weekend with another "pre-wedding fest". But, I'm not really complaining... for the food was awesometastic. Then we were to go to have some roller coaster fun at Frontier City. They close the park at 11 p.m, so any plans after that would be made as we crossed that bridge. We chose to go back to Bricktown and end the night with time spent at a lovely restaurant with the name having something to do with owls... or something like that. But the story isn't that simple.... no, no, no, no, no.... I'll go into a little more detail. Let's do this like Quentin Tarentino.
Frontier CityIt was much more fun than I expected. You see, our group JUST got through eating a fairly large meal at Zio's. So, full stomachs and roller coasters with loops don't mix well. But, I never blew chunks.... rejected the picante, hurled, face pooped,... We did pretty much all the rides worth riding. (Meaning all the non-kiddy rides.)
The time was approaching the 11 p.m. closing period, so we were making our way through the park to exit. To exit we had to pass many of the play-games-for-prizes areas. One of them was a basketball shot being operated by an attractive female (we'll call her Sheila). She yelled out towards us to try to coax us into playing a game. So, we convinced the "groom" to give it a try, but under certain conditions. One, if he made one of the two shots, Sheila would have to do a sort of slow dance with Bryan. Then, to further coax us into playing the game, SHE suggested that she would offer a contradulatory kiss. We were game.
Bryan made the very first shot. And missed the second. Either way, he won not only a mini-basketball, but a dance and a kiss. Bryan was very hesitant, but went on with the dance. No harm done. But when the time came for the kiss, he politely refused, for which I totally understand. I would have done the same. So, she was left there with nobody to kiss. We needed a "groom replacement". I, Kent, took charge. I was the "groom replacement". And if you haven't been following along, this means that I'm getting a free kiss.
So, I took my place in front of "Sheila". And at this point, I'm wondering how this kiss is going to go down. Is it going to be a kiss on the cheek? A smack on the lips? I was about to ask her about the procedure when she made her move. I guess I was going to have to wing it. And wing it, I did. It was a full-on semi-make out session. Open mouth. The guys with me were just as amazed as I was at the moment... in fact, it still leaves me in amazement. The kiss lasted roughly three seconds, but it seemed like it lasted MUCH longer. In the view of my fellow brethren, I had received extra "cool points". I wanted to stay, but we left anyway soon thereafter. If you don't believe me, then come and see me... I have proof. And no, it's not a disease. I should go to Frontier City more often...
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Owl-like" eateryYou can probably tell by the mini-title what place I'm referring to. But, after Frontier City, we decided that the night isn't over. We wanted to embarrass Bryan in some form or fashion. And what better place than a bunch of hard working ladies from the owl joint? We got there and told the employees there as the the upcoming marital status of our fine friend, and it turned out there was another groom-to-be there. So, they gathered them both and equally embarrassed at the same time. They did a song and dance. Quite beautiful, really. But the introduction to the song and dance was unique. They announced that these two men were getting married. Which is true, but the way they said it made it sound like they were marrying each other. Which was news to me... I didn't know Bryan was gay...
I also was called gay because I didn't order any pie. This was an up and down day...
Until next time, vaya con Dios.